The Most Terrible Things Indiana Jones Has Ever Done

In Dark Horse Comics' Star Wars Tales #19, Harrison Ford's two most famous characters (sorry, Rick Deckard, you're great but you're decidedly second-tier) meet in an inter-series cross-over—kind of, anyway. In the first half of "Into the Great Unknown," Han Solo and Chewbacca find themselves, as they often do, pursued by Imperial forces. With the Millennium Falcon's navi-computer on the fritz, Solo must make a blind hyperspace jump in order to survive. When the Falcon emerges from lightspeed, it's in orbit around Earth—yes, our Earth—where Han decides to stop for repairs.

If you think you know where this is going, just wait: you probably don't. The Falcon crash-lands in the forest, and right as Han observes that the planet looks a lot like Endor, a tribe of Native Americans attack. Chewbacca fights them off, but not before the natives pump Han Solo full of arrows. This is where you'd expect Indiana Jones to swing to the rescue, escort Solo to safety, and save the day. But no: the smuggler bleeds out and dies in Chewbacca's arms.

Flash-forward 126 years. Indiana Jones, Short Round, and their Native American guide scour the forest, looking for Chewbacca, who's since become known as the legendary sasquatch. Their intent is clear: the tracker carries a rifle, while Indy quips that "the museum isn't paying for footprints." In other words, Indiana Jones is hunting his alter ego's best friend for cash. Whether or not Chewbacca survives the experience doesn't seem to make much difference.

Indy and his crew track Chewie to the Millennium Falcon, where they find Han Solo's arrow-ridden corpse. That gives Indy a strange sense of deja vu, and he's rattled enough to call off the hunt, thereby ending the most depressing crossover in Star Wars and Indiana Jones history.